For the Record. I have NEVER kept a blog before. So I'm not really sure how I'm suppose to do this. All i know is that I'm going to show you my journey as a new mother. So sit back and Relax because this is going to be a bumpy ride. :) ENJOY!!
This is my Cuddle Bug.
She is 4 weeks (1 month) old at 12:35am TONIGHT. Her name is Tensley Danielle Thackston.
Let me just say that this BEAUTIFUL little girl has completely CHANGED my life. I'm a much better person because she is in it. She was definitely an element of surprise. I was in the worst time in my life. and i KNOW i was depressed but i didn't realize exactly how bad till now. i look back and see that if it wasn't for Danie i have absolutely NO CLUE where i would be right now. During the depression (hard for me to talk about) i was drinking a lot. just about every weekend i was drunk. if i couldn't get out of the house (when i was living with my parents) i would just lock myself up in my room and just sleep. After i RANDOMLY moved out without telling anyone i did so, witch i so regretted doing because i hurt so many people, i would couch surf. That means that i would jump from house to house living on my Friends couches. And i lost my job i Dropped out of college. Not the proudest moment in my life.
This is the HARDEST thing to talk about so please understand that I'm opening up and putting my heart out there. Something that i have NEVER done before so its taking a lot out of me.
This is me RIGHT before i found out i was pregnant.
I look sick YES. Smoking really DID NOT help with my health nor did the drinking. (not proud of)
When i took the test it was really a joke because i was arguing with someone that i wasn't pregnant and that i would take one just to prove that i wasn't. Well..... i was. Sooo many things went through my head. The first one was how far along am I? and Who was the father. well i found out how far along i was. i was 5 weeks pregnant.
LONG STORY SHORT. I know who the father is and he wants nothing to do with it.
I moved back home with my parents. We get along better than ever. Mom and I have NEVER been so close. We talk about everything with each other. And that relationship is one that i will NEVER screw up. It took me a LONG time to get to where i am today. My dad and I RARELY fight now witch is a good thing because when we fought we would really fight to the point where we wouldn't talk to each other for days.
All this happened because I believe that my little girl was sent from God to put me back on the right track. She has made me the HAPPIEST woman on earth. I can honestly say that i LOVE being a mom. I love being able to wake up in the morning and see her little face and it just makes me smile. No matter how much she cries or how much i want to scream sometimes. I think it all comes with being a mother. all i have to do is look at her and everything is alright again. And I'm LOVING every minute of it. <3
I just wanted to say THANK YOU for taking the time to read what i had to say.
and I'm looking forward to you reading more of what i write in the future.
much love.
No comments:
Post a Comment